


Inconvenient Truths

by grelleswife



Series: Kuroshitsuji Role Plays [5]
Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Aftermath of Violence, Collaboration, Confessions, Identity Reveal, Other, Sebastian let a bit too much of his demon show during a job for the young master, and now Mey is upset with him, not against Mey though!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:41:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24065239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grelleswife/pseuds/grelleswife
Summary: Mey Rin is furious with Sebastian after he slaughters a seemingly innocent family with inhuman cruelty. The ensuing confrontation may force Sebastian to reveal his true nature...and risk alienating the woman he has come to love.Written in collaboration with bapydemonprincess on Tumblr
Relationships: Mey-Rin/Sebastian Michaelis
Series: Kuroshitsuji Role Plays [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1730281
Comments: 17
Kudos: 27
Collections: Anime FF





	Inconvenient Truths

**Author's Note:**

> An edited version of roleplay done with my friend bapydemonprincess. Both of us contributed to the manuscript.

“Mey, what’s the matter?”

“Are you feeling ill, dear?”

“Why are you looking at me that way?”

Silence. She wasn’t giving him a reply, not tonight, at any rate.

The butler signed and pressed on, almost pleadingly, “When you say nothing, it’s like you’ve stuck a knife in my side.”

Mey Rin was swiftly trying to get through last-minute chores, though working much faster than usual, as her mind was a bit of a train wreck. Sebastian shadowing her every move to try and get her to talk was not helping matters.

Finally, heaving a heavy sigh, Mey Rin roughly slammed down a plate she was supposed to be washing, and looked up at the kitchen ceiling as she finally muttered, “Would you rather I _did_ stick a knife in your side, Sebastian?”

She didn’t turn around fully, just tilted her head to glare through her big round glasses at him with those sharp, piercing eyes.

“Because that could be arranged.”

Damn it _all_. There was no denying Mey Rin’s anger. The sweet-tempered woman rarely addressed anyone this way in earnest. At present, however, Sebastian thanked the legions of hell that she didn’t have a rifle nearby.

“Of course not, dear, but isn’t natural for us to be at odds,” he replied gently, desperate to mollify his irate lover. It pained him to see her this upset, especially when he was the one at fault. Sebastian still didn’t understand why she blamed him, but it might be one of those irrational human scruples that he had yet to acquire.

Her eyes flashed, and her hands curled into fists at her sides. “Well, it ain’t _natural_ for someone to butcher an entire family, Sebastian, but you went an’ did it! Even though the youngest was only two, he was!”

Ah…so that was the issue. The demon sometimes forgot that mortals tended to assign greater value to children’s lives. A meaningless distinction to creatures like him, but clearly not to Mey Rin.

“I hardly had a say in the matter. It was on the queen’s orders and at our young master’s command. As a butler, I could only obey.”

For a brief moment, confusion overrode anger, but then started to blend with it, making the woman look even fiercer with the justification of her rage.

“As—as a _butler_?! I don’t see any other butlers out there, followin’ orders so literally, no I don’t, Sebastian! I know maybe you ain’t from England yourself originally, but you seem to have been 'ere much much longer than folks like me, so you should know that you didn’t HAVE TO–”

“Yes, I _did_ , Mey Rin.” Sebastian interrupted, voice a bit louder to speak over her rising tone, but still level and calm, hoping beyond hope he could somehow use it, as well as his overall stance, to tame her temper.

He couldn’t.

“Wh-what does that mean? Don’t tell me the young master has been, a-all this time, forcin’ you to do things like this or…o-or else he’ll do somethin’, cause I don’t think he’s that bad, and you…you…”

Suddenly, all the moments she’d seen Sebastian fight someone flashed before her eyes in rapid succession.

The realization that despite their recent months of newfound intimacy, physical or otherwise, she didn’t entirely know the butler gripped her hard.

It suddenly made Mey Rin start to tear up.

_Who the **hell** was Sebastian Michaelis?_

“The young master doesn’t force me to do anything, but I am bound by our contract. The consequences if I disobeyed his orders would be dire.”

They were venturing into dangerous territory. Sebastian couldn’t reveal much more without spilling his secrets, and he wasn’t naïve enough to believe that a mortal woman would want a demon for a lover. Not even a woman with as soft and generous a heart as Mey Rin. For that reason, he daren’t explain that the family he’d slain had been possessed by raging fiends, the sort of demons lacking any intellect beyond their base appetites and a desire for violence. Their victims’ souls had promptly been devoured, leaving the demons to occupy the husks that remained and wreak havoc. As he’d explained to the young master at the time, they only had the messy option of destroying them outright, a simple enough matter for a devilish marquis.

If he couldn’t offer Mey Rin an open disclosure, he should at least put the matter to rest.

Sebastian plunged ahead before the maid had time for further objections. “Our master must walk a dark path in service to the queen. Sometimes I get blood on my hands while aiding him in that goal. Your understanding need go no further than that.”

Mey Rin’s lips parted, and her eyes filled to the brim with tears.

“Why do you keep shuttin’ me out?” she whispered. The hurt in her voice stung more than any anger.

Oh, dear…this wasn’t how he thought his clear and precise explanation would go! Mey Rin was supposed to calm down and say she understood. She was supposed to—

And before he could say another word, she was darting out of the kitchen, likely going to her room.

As she rushed by, a small wail escaped her mouth. And that itself felt like a knife stabbing the demon.

“M-Mey, wait!” he cried, whirling around to try and stop her, but…the little sniper did move fast, even for a human.

A strange feeling overcame the demon, making him want to shout himself, and possibly make a mess in the kitchen that would lead to quite a bit of cleanup.

Sebastian clenched his white-gloved hands, then found himself looking down at them. Found himself peeling off that left glove and glowering at his own demonic seal, something he’d seen every day of this contract, and dozens of other contracts before.

But tonight, he did not look at it with pride as a demon is wont to do.

He looked at it like it was a curse on this false skin of his…

He ignored his own shaking, growling, and gritted teeth.

He ignored everything around him because all that mattered was that he wanted MEY RIN to be happy. To be safe. To know the _truth_!

But none of these things could possibly be, and it made the demon want to scream.

Why couldn’t he just tell her, just this once let a human in who was not the contract holder? Hell, Sieglinde had almost unraveled his secret, and coming that close to doing so hadn’t done a thing to the world around them. He hadn’t had to kill her or wipe her memory. And she’d continued to help them, despite her knowledge of infernal cults and demons…

So why not his goddamned _lover_?

If ANYONE deserved the truth, it was her.

Sebastian took a breath in, then out. Perhaps it was time to be a little selfish and see where this went.

Sebastian quickly put his glove back on, and tried to shake his head to get his face to stop heating up so much! Oh Satan, why did this have to happen to him?!

Mey Rin had collapsed onto her bed, curling up in her maid’s uniform and letting out muffled wails into her pillow. Tears streamed messily, and her face had turned redder than her hair.

She was…she was so DUMB. She should’ve NEVER fallen for that wretched butler! She should’ve known he’d just lead her down another dark path of confusion and pain. Of not being TRUSTED, despite how long they’d known each other.

“Why…. why?” She mumbled, sobbing. “Why am I so stupid… why…?” She couldn’t understand why everything and everyone in this world was so cruel. Couldn’t she catch a break?!

Sebastian rushed to her bedroom, little caring how undignified he might appear. The demon frantically rapped at the door.

“Mey!” he called, voice low and urgent.

“G-go away!” he heard her sniffle miserably. The demon sighed, trepidation settling like lead in the pit of his stomach. It would take all his powers of persuasion to get back in her good graces.

“Please. I came to apologize, and…and to offer you a proper explanation for my behavior.”

After an interminable silence, he heard Mey Rin hesitantly get to her feet and shuffle across the room. The door opened with a loud creak. Sebastian winced upon seeing how distraught she was, face blotchy and eyes raw from crying.

“May I come in?”

She nodded sullenly after another long pause. Sebastian entered and sat on the edge of the bed, motioning her to join him. “I see now that the answer I gave you was hardly satisfactory.”

“Y’ can say that again, Sebastian!” Mey Rin replied in a burst of anger. The demon bowed his head. He had to admit that he deserved her reproach.

The butler gently encased her hands in his gloved ones. She flinched, but stayed put, looking deep into his eyes, searching for…what? What did she hope to find therein?

“But it was never my intention to push you aside, dear. I wanted to protect you.”

“Protec’ me from what, Sebastian?” she insisted as fresh tears spilled from her eyes. “I’m a Phantomhive servant too, I am. I’ve seen an’ done all sorts o’ things, an’ I don’t scare easily.”

“Even if you knew what lurks beneath my mask?”

Mey Rin’s nose wrinkled, and she looked like she wanted to roll her eyes despite how red and itchy they now were.

“‘Mask’? Are you sayin’ you aren’t jus’ a butler, and maybe your name ain’t originally Sebastian Michaelis? ’Cause I figured that much. We all’ ad dark pasts before comin’ ’ere and—”

“Mey, please…” Sebastian hated the thought of antagonizing her further by interrupting, but he needed to if he was ever to get this out. “I understand it’s difficult to grasp that there could be worse things in this household than what you or the others have been and done. However, I meant something much more…” He slowly slipped his glove off again to reveal that dark seal on his clear, pale skin, and his black nails. He then let his eyes openly glow, pupils turn to slits, and teeth gradually sharpen. “... literal.”

Mey Rin took a minute, first assessing the hand he had revealed, then looking up as she sensed he was showing even more. And, indeed, her sharp eyes widened at the inhuman gaze and bared fangs. The demon sitting on her bed sensed her heart beat rapidly increase.

He didn’t move a muscle, nor blink, sitting still for his human lover lest fear entirely consume her.

There _was_ fear in her eyes, but he knew without a doubt that this woman wasn’t one to flee at the first sign of danger. No. Not after everything. She didn’t let it take control but stubbornly stayed by his side, looking at everything, reaching out with her free hand to run a finger over the back of his hand and the dark mark etched on it.

“What…wh-what does that symbolize then?”

“It’s called a contract seal.”

“C-Contract—” She recalled him bringing that up numerous times, but never in her wildest dreams did she think it would mean…

“So…you an’ the young m-master are…”

Sebastian nodded, “Bound by what is known as a Faustian bargain.”

“And that’s… that’s not a normal thing…a…h-human thing, is it?”

Sebastian’s mounting concern grew further as his next words came out.

“No, it is not. It’s demonic thing…a bargain my kind make with mortals.”

“Th-that’s what you meant by bein’ ‘bound by contract’?”

“Yes. At one point in the past, at a desperate time in his life—a moment of hellish despair—the boy made this pact with me. And in return for my services, I will eat his soul when our contract reaches its end. That is how it goes.”

Mey Rin remained silent, openly trembling, and her gaze now becoming… haunted….

Sebastian reached out with his other hand, carefully running it through loose strands of her hair, thinking on the fact that he may never get to touch her or hold her or even see her again after this.

“I am deeply sorry, my dear, for keeping you in the dark. But this goes beyond the typical stories of a troubled past. I’m not sure if I made the right choice to tell you now, but I couldn’t bear to see you hurt, and heartbroken, especially…” He sighed, “not by a monster such as I.”

More tears came as Mey Rin mulled over his words, and she stared ahead blankly while she tried to think about what this all meant.

“Did…did you plan on killin’ me…an' the others after that contract’s done, Seba—” She cut herself off at that, not sure if she should address him with that name.

“ _No_ , that doesn’t always happen if others get involved with a contracted human. In most cases, they remain oblivious to the fact that there was anything demonic at play, even when the contractee turns up dead from unknown causes.” Sebastian awaited the likely backlash that was in store from the girl who was fiercely loyal to the young master, who cared for the boy as much as her fellow servants did.

“And you should still call me Sebastian if you wish, Mey Rin, as that is my name in this form,” he added as an afterthought. He didn’t know why but it…it was important to him.

For he was Sebastian Michaelis, and she was his Mey Rin. And that was how he wanted it to stay.

Damn. He felt his insides seize up, the constriction tightening his throat. Something encroached on his vision and burned his eyes. He reached up briefly to dab at them. Oh Lucifer…these couldn’t be…

Mey Rin blinked at the sudden movements, and stared up at “Sebastian” while he rubbed his eye as if a lash or other irritant was troubling it.

Mey Rin swallowed and cocked her head to the side.

“Is somethin’ wrong?”

“Ah, d-don’t mind me. Just a minor _inconvenience_ that shouldn’t be there in my eyes. I’ll—”

Mey Rin grabbed a handkerchief, though. She got on her knees, holding the man—well, demon’s—head and blotting at the clear liquid on the verge of leaking from those cat-like, luminous eyes.

Meanwhile, Sebastian sat like a stuffed scarecrow, tongue-tied and baffled.

“You…you don’t have to do that, Mey Rin,” he uttered in a voice surprisingly weak and nearly a whisper.

“I know,” she responded just as quietly, and after a minute pulled back to look fully into his face, “But…if you can cry just like I can…then…I feel a little better, and not so scared,” she admitted, and timidly tried to smile.

“I-” Sebastian stammered, eyes bulging and mouth parting. His face flushing with heat! “I assure you it’s not something I normally do…”

“But you _can_ do it,” Mey Rin insisted, and even more came to mind. “Jus.. .jus’ like you can learn to care about someone like me and wanna tell me the truth like you did. I still don’t like that you killed those innocent people, especially the boy, no I don’t. But…it had somethin’ to do with demons, didn’t it? And so you had to do somethin’… _demonic_ to deal with it?”

Sebastian felt ready to hide in his natural form among the shadows, having a human explain his own doings in such a way.

“Y-Yes. They were possessed, and the only way to take of it was destroying them.”

“But you’ve never possessed the young master, ‘ave you?” Mey Rin suddenly asked, sitting back on the bed and pulling her warm, gentle hands away.

“No, no. That isn’t something I do. Especially not to a contracted human. It would defeat the purpose of having a contract altogether if I took control. Much like a child playing with its food instead of eating it. Not _aesthetic_.”

Mey Rin’s eyebrows furrowed, and she squinted in utter confusion, shaking her head.

“I…I’ll need t’sleep on all this, I think…” she mumbled, looking over at the expanse of her bed, and also letting her weariness shine through.

Sebastian rose immediately as if prompted. “That’s absolutely fine, Mey Rin. I do not blame you. It has been a rough day for you, and you need sleep.”

Mey Rin started to get up as well to put a night gown on, when something else occurred to her.

“You…you’ve never slept when you were in bed with me.”

Sebastian smiled ruefully. She was putting the pieces together. “That’s correct. Unlike humans, _we_ do not require sleep. I watched over you while you rested.”

Mey Rin’s expression softened, and her gaze grew contemplative.

“W-would you mind tryin’ somethin’...for me?”

Certainly,” he answered, curious as to what the request might be.

She bit her bottom lip. “How about you try sleepin’ with me tonight? If you can cry, I bet you can sleep, too!”

“I’m not sure if that’s possible, Mey. It’s been decades since I truly slept, or dreamed. I’m a bit out of practice, as strange as that must sound.”

“But couldn’t you _try_ , at least?” she begged. The demon was overcome with shame. After all he’d put her through, he had no right to begrudge her such a small favor.

“I can—for you,” he replied quietly. He dashed back to his own room to fetch his nightclothes (despite her new knowledge, Mey Rin might be disconcerted to see him vanish in a “leap”), changed, and got into bed, where Mey Rin lay waiting. He curled his body around hers and kissed that russet hair.

“You said you’d, um, got ‘out of practice’ for sleepin’...could I do somethin’ to help you remember?” she asked him as her hand wrapped around one of his.

“Hmm...tell me what you feel when you enter the border between waking and dreaming. Perhaps it will jog my memory.”

“Uh...well, my eyelids start droopin’, and my body gets heavy like a stone. Not in a bad way, though. Peaceful-like. An’ my thoughts get fuzzy and start goin’ every which way, and my mind sinks down like a bucket in a well.”

A gradual fading of consciousness...Sebastian deliberately forced his muscles to relax, unclenching his jaw and allowing his limbs to drape themselves loosely over his lover. Instead of rapidly assimilating information from his senses, he let his mind turn inward, refusing to analyze his thoughts but simply letting them flow. The blood and fire from the raid...plans for tomorrow’s lunch...and Mey Rin. Mey loading her rifle, or looking up to smile at him while doing the laundry, or laughing when he whispered some witty remark in her ear. Oh, Mey...

His mental state was hazier than before, but Sebastian didn’t exactly sense himself “drifting off.” Then Mey Rin started to sing. The lyrics were in Chinese, the innate musicality of the language lending the notes an enthralling shimmer. She might have learned it as a child, before illness had cut her parents’ lives short. Regardless, it was a soothing lullaby, running on like a silvery river. Sebastian nestled closer, trying to follow the tune. He couldn’t hold onto it, though. It kept slipping away...

The last thing he thought of before the gentle darkness enveloped his mind was Mey Rin’s hand, fingers intertwined with his.

**Author's Note:**

> a devilish marquis: We headcanon Sebastian as the Marquis Naberius, a demon referenced in the Lesser Key of Solomon


End file.
